Eclectic Haze

Tag: writing

  • a milestone?

    I turned 70 today and it absolutely blows my mind. Not because I’m old, or what some in society consider old, but because I’m looking back at everything I’ve done since my twenties and I can’t really say that I thought it would turn out like this!

    I still work although sometimes I miss doing shows, teaching, you know all that stuff that Scorpios like doing because it puts them front and center on stage. It’s kind of the thing that we do! But I’m comfortable in where I’m at and I thought, a long time ago, that I would be slowing down but it doesn’t seem to be working out that way. Mom worked until she was 80 so I have big shoes to fill.

    looking back at an old post I did in August I have decided to finish what I started back then during this next week off, my first since the year 2000. It’s been a rough year and I have gone back and forth from doing to not doing what needs to be done. So my new year starts November 1st. Getting back to being comfortable in my skin, spending more time with Princess who even now demands attention while I talk into my phone! Every time I talk into my phone whether it’s a call or something like this, she seems to think that she needs to be involved in the conversation! Creating new outfits that a lot of people will probably think are WAy too young for my age but it’s me. I’m going back to working out every morning or evening depending on my schedule. I’m going back to eating what I need to eat to keep me healthy. And I’m not going to feel guilty about treating myself.

    I’m going to listen to the dreams I have almost nightly, of me and Mom running dungeons and me spending my nights looking for her and learn to let that go. Not forgetting just accepting.

    I’ve met, and done hair on, so many fabulous people. Yeah I’m talking about you. Thank you. Thank you for accepting me and all my craziness. Thank you for listening to my stories even though some of them may have been repeated. Thank you for taking care of me when I needed it. When things seem dark every day, you brighten my life. Thank you for lecturing me when I needed it. Barring any sort of apocalypse I’ll be around for a long time.

    love to all of you

    janet

  • Wondering what the world is

    i haven’t written in my blog lately because things have been a little sideways. My cat boy has been sick so I’m taking care of him. i have realized that just because you think someone is “the one” doesn’t mean they really are… especially when they disappear without explanation leaving you to wallow around in the mire, trapped and asking yourself “what did I do wrong?”.

    i read a little meme the other day that said, “be decisive. The streets are littered with flat squirrels that couldn’t make a decision” … or something to that effect, you get the idea.

    i am tired of people who talk behind your back forgetting how small this area really is.  of course the need to spread maliciousness has become a national pastime.

    a friend who moved here from england told me that she was thinking about going back because the american people aren’t like they were when she first arrived all those years ago. we really are the ugly americans and the sad thing is, most are proud of it… and that goes for both sides.

    maybe i am just tired

    time to read Rob Brezsny’s book “Pronoia”

    j

     

  • afterglow

    so the 50,000 words in a month start today and i am still basking in the glow of another birthday. no, no parties or festivities or even a cake (rico not having opposable thumbs). no, the afterglow is the feeling of finding your place in your place. that feel of connection, of purpose and of peace. i am now 62 and i think i deserve to quit worrying. i don’t want to huddle with the masses, afraid of what’s coming next, what will happen if that and do we have any future.

    i choose life and love and hope.

    tonight i start my book, 1666.6 words per day. i have been doing this every november for about 13 years and haven’t finished one yet.  this year i will because this year i will simply write and use paper and pencil instead of a computer… because then i can feel what is happening and where they (the characters) are going and how they are feeling. and i won’t plan i will just watch the “movie”. if you want to know what it’s all about, this novel in a month thing go to National Novel Writing Month.

    thank you for all your well wishes, you truly are my friends and i “like” love you all

    namaste

    j

  • downtime…

    much better today thank you, but still don’t want to be here… i am tired and slightly nauseous from all the cold meds yesterday but i am at work. staying in my space so as not to spread germs…kicked back on the couch drinking red grape juice which, believe it or not, actually helps with chest congestion. have no idea why or how but it does help… weird though… friends are making merry over the DOMA thing, i am happy for everyone… my brain is mush, profound thoughts running through my head, colliding and spinning off in so many directions… creating new “things” to bother me with late at night… suffice to say this is a truly dumb post but i am publishing anyway since i have vowed to write something everyday… getting ready for NANOWRIMO…

    j