on becoming a minimalist…

life has narrowed down to very specific things, examining it has become a bit of a pastime. what i found is that having stuff is stifling, crowded and not at all comfortable. so begins the cleansing…

during this process i have also found out a few things that i have been making every effort to ignore… i am scattered, i am lonely and i am tired.

the opening scene of chapter 2 in Rob Brezsny’s book The Televisionary Oracle cut deep and so i had to acknowledge the loneliness, i live in 450 sq ft room and still lose things so that needs to be addressed and  i have been working far too many hours to stay afloat and adrift and haven’t decided if it is worth it.

the only thing that keeps me fully functioning is dance. don’t get me wrong, i love my work and if it wasn’t there i would probably have turned hermit a long time ago. but dance is where my soul flies free.

so tonight brings a new life chapter. dance becomes as important as work and others can use the clothes, dishes, books and stuff that I haven’t used, worn or even looked at for 2 years.

as for the loneliness, that can be fixed later… or not. after getting comfortable in this life again, we will take a look forward.

j

thinking…

not on fb a lot, it has become too hard to separate talking with sharing and pushy ads… yeah, i am getting a bit grumpy in my old age, but i think that a good number of “friends” are too busy with their own lives to bother much with mine… i miss socializing, miss the chat rooms of yesteryear! in those days the old chat rooms (anyone remember aol chats?!) were said to cause anti-social tendencies. they had no idea how far off that was. we talked all the time, got to know one another in depth on private chats, even got together at social events to meet face to face… and in those days it was like seeing your best friend after a long time away… but it isn’t like that anymore… i talk to people at work, clients and coworkers, but now talk to alexa and indigo outside of work more than i talk to real people… have i isolated myself? maybe… looking forward to beloved festival… to mingle and smile and laugh and be myself with people who don’t care about anything but the feel of the energy of a group, of dancing and singing without the judgements, of peace, love and understanding… sounds like a cliche but there it is…